The 5 Best Songs on The Simpsons

My parents were never too strict about the “14A” ratings on various TV shows. And for that, I am thankful. I grew up watching The Simpsons with most of the jokes flying over my head, but I still loved it. Every night at 5 on CBC they used to play an episode. Missing it was not an option.

Sure, we can argue all night about if the new episodes are still as funny. But we can all agree on one thing, the first seasons were just so great. I mean, have you ever met someone who claims they don’t like The Simpsons? Well, I’ll tell you something. They’re lying through their pretentious, veneered teeth.

Here are my favourite moments from The Simpsons to distract you from all the stupid new shows on TV now. (If I have to watch another commercial for “Whitney” I am going to go Elvis-style on my TV.) Have a look back and remember how the world used to be, before they had to add a stupid “this show contains violence, coarse language, etc” warning before each episode. Kids have been watching TV for years, but apparently only recently parents have been wanting the TV networks to do the actual parenting for them. Hmm.
(I’m sorry, but if your 6 year old child is watching sitcoms at 3am and you are unaware, those warnings are not going to help anything and you should probably be a better parent.)

5. “Canyonero”

“Can you name the truck with 4-wheel-drive? Smells like a steak and seats thirty-five.” Yes, yes I can.
If this clip doesn’t make you think of all the overweight soccer-moms who nearly run you off the road on their way to Starbucks, then please, tell me where you live. I want to move there.

4. Bart and Milhouse go on a Bender: “Springfield, Springfield”

Super sugary squishee? Check. Crazy, innocent fun? Check. Every child’s dream? Check. (Except for the waking-up-as-a-junior-camper thing.)

3. Mr. Burns: “See My Vest”

The ultimate villain song sung by the ultimate villain.

2. The Stonecutters: “We Do”

It is because of this song that I keep getting the real-life Masons and the Stonecutters mixed up. (Although, I’m sure this is a real-life Stonecutters club somewhere.)

1. “Monorail”

More relevant than ever in Torontoeveryone knows the Monorail song. When has a town getting scammed ever been so damn catchy?

Honourable mention:

“Spring in Springfield”

A good, ol’ fashioned sing along about a burlesque house. Pure goodness. This song, one of the best, unfortunately is lacking a full upload on YouTube. I figured each song on my list should at least have a fair representation in their videos.

Now, is it possible to have all of those songs stuck in your head at once? Good luck. *evil laughter*

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5 responses to “The 5 Best Songs on The Simpsons

  1. I’m just glad you didn’t include the Mr. Plow song that everybody seems to reference. That song is literally two lines.

    I’d have to say my favorite was “See My Vest” because growing up a 90s Disney kid you completely get the parody of it all.

  2. I’m with you on these – good selection.

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